Pickling December

Last Month's Brine

This time last year I wrote:

Today, next year, I’d love to be able to say I have _______.

I also hope ______ has gotten easier by then.

And, that I finally started to ______.

Today, I wrote:

Today I’m able to say I have served as an educator, published as a writer, dreamt as a Dreamer, and cried as a Happy Person.

Everything has gotten easier.

I finally started to think about things as a garden—the fruits of my labor in and out of season are growing at different speeds and blooming at different times. I started to embrace mistakes, choosing to forgive myself for being young. I started thinking of my parents as two people who brought me into the world, and I began getting to know them again as I let them in to get to know me as well. I finally started to trust that in due time, it will all be okay.

Thank you for reading another year of words, I promise I have more to say!

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Here are the fragments that made up my December this year submerged in vague nostalgia, infused with self-reflection, and squeezed into jars:

What I saw…

• Wet bikini hanging to dry

• Bienvenidos

• Cumbia steps

• Twine

• “Memita”

• Tamales

• The horizon

• Naps on the hamaca

• Pavement discotecas

• “Ron con hielo”

• Green satin

• Tia Menche

• Surf!

• Queso con loroco

• life jackets

• Tears of joy

• Dancing Robot

• Ins & Outs

• Mango tierno

• Cuts of fatty tuna

• A kiss at the red light

What I Tasted…

• Negi-goma Ramen; Ramen Dambo, Park Slope

• Natalia; Brooklyn Kura, Industry City

• Guava Pisco Sour; Palmetto

What I Heard…

re-sharing; low light; dusty corners; messy drawers; kiss on the cheek; remembering a face; taking a walk; trying to balance; oranges

What I Smelled…

• Strawberry Milk

• Burning firewood

• Gasoline

• Tanning oil

• Sautéed onions

What I Felt…

• Grounded

• Butterflies

• Cheery

• Emotional

• Spontaneous

Happy New Year.